Knives, close to home

You know those times when life is just great and every thing seems to be going smoothly? You know when, right in the middle of that, you get blindsided by a Mac truck transporting Secrets & Lies? I really, really hate those times. Say your having a great conversation with someone and things have been going well when right out of the blue they slip in one little line that changes everything. You know the ones that are couched so nicely in the flow of conversation that at first you miss them and then all of a sudden the ceiling falls in. Your first response is "What the heck did you just say?" Though likely as not you aren't so polite about it. Followed closely by the "You did what?!?" or other variations there of. And for some completely unknown reason people assume this is a great way to tell you. Personaly I like a little more warning so I can take a seat and maybe have a stiff drink beside me. I mean seriously you don't drop a comment like "I have cancer" into the middle of a sentence and expect a calm reaction from someone. I mean really, give them some warning. That kind of thing is okay when telling people your getting married or something nice like that but it sure as heck doesn't work for bad news. You really think people are going to love you for springing bad news on them? Or that the conversation can just keep going the way it was before? This doesn't even work in the movies, what on earth makes you think it would work in real life?!

The other thing about the revelation of Secrets and Lies, is how it changes everything. People who reveal them some how assume that by reassuring you with words that you will believe them that nothing else they said is a lie and that they have no other secrets. But it doesn't work like that does it? No of course not, if someone has told you a nice big fib then you find yourself questioning everything they've said to you. Even if the words are true the context isn't anymore, so like it or not what they said before no longer means the same thing.

I don't know, personally I just wish people would swallow their pride and tell me these things as soon as they happened so we could just get down to pulling the knife out of my back and start the healing process. It takes long enough, and is painful enough, as is with out the added damage done by keeping it from someone for an extended period of time. The longer the secret is kept the less chance there is of salvaging your relationship with that person. I really hate this stuff.