Feeling like an ass and acting like one too

So I didn't just manage to put my foot in my mouth. Oh no I managed to shove both legs down my throat right up to the knee. Am I embarrassed? Yes but even more I'm ashamed. I haven't acted so badly since I was in 9th grade. What on earth is wrong with me, seriously? The smarter I get the dumber I act. Okay maybe not but I do seem to have a problem processing relationships at the moment. Oh man I am feeling so bad at the moment. I hope I get a chance to straighten this out tonight. Personally I think I deserve a swift kick in the head. If anyone talked to me the way I talked tonight I would probably disregard anything they said ever again. Ya this is definitely an apology because... argh I can't believe myself. There is no way I'm getting any sleep tonight if I don't get this straightened out but how do you apologize for something like this? How do you repair a friendship after something so stupid! I certainly can't expect any sort of respect. There is nothing like understanding the pain you cause to destroy the last bit of confidence you have in yourself. I'm sorry L, kick me if you want I certainly deserve it. I'm sorry, forgive me if you can.